Most who know me would describe me as a very positive person, or at the very least, always having a positive outlook. People like to tease me when I post or talk about having a challenging day with things like:
“Wow, it’s nice to know you are human…”
“Well that’s refreshing…we thought you were a badass superhero…”
My intention isn’t to be viewed any certain way. I just don’t think that the negative things, ahem, I mean “things of contrast” need to be shared with others. Especially not on social media where most people tend to forget about the hundreds or even thousands of people that will read what they write.
That being said – There ARE times here and there when I feel …well..um…how do I put it tactfully…..what’s the word I am desperately groping for? Ok fine, a FUNK. Sometime I get in a funk.
From here on out to be known as:
We’ve all been there. I have to say with the exception of the regular challenges here and there with life in general, I am able to stay out of the F.U.N.K. But this last time it crept up on me real slow-like. I’ll accept that I allowed it to get a firm little foothold. And that was all it needed to take root and make a cozy little home for itself. Then it grew like a weed. The bastard….
It came in so slowly that it almost felt like a light depression, like a fog that I couldn’t quite put my finger on, but I knew that I just didn’t feel right.
Ever been there?
I wish I would have caught it a bit sooner, but I am grateful that I did catch it….like a ton of bricks……in the shower. (Isn’t that where the best ah-ha moments take place?) I said “ah-ha” not “ooh-ahhh” get your mind out of the gutter.
So – I wish that the reason and answer here was more profound than it is, and I wish I could share something new and groundbreaking with you, but it’s not. It’s simple. Super-simple. It’s also the culprit for many of us nine times out of ten.
Ready? Here it is:
My thoughts and speech were focused on the things that I did not want and did not love versus the things that I do want and do love. This caused a shitload of resistance. No Bueno.
I hear you, I hear you, “Oh no, not you Word Sniper!” Yes. Me.
I slipped. I let a few things build all at once and I lost my footing. I did a great job justifying it. It hid under the guise of “being realistic” and it hid under the guise of “practicality” and ultimately I sold myself on it.
I think at one point in there I actually felt a little sorry for myself. I’m not proud of it. Just being honest.
Maybe you’ve been there, or maybe you are there right now, here are a few things I needed to remember, since I was doing so much “Forgetting” of that Universal Never-ending Knowledge.
I forgot to remember that I am supposed to be learning and growing.
I forgot to remember to enjoy the ride.
I forgot to remember that it’s supposed to be fun.
I forgot to remember to smile.
I forgot to remember to laugh.
I forgot to remember that I am loved.
I forgot to remember that I am needed.
I forgot to remember that it’s ok to ask for help.
I forgot to remember that I don’t have to have all the answers.
I forgot to remember that it always works out for my greater good.
And most of all, I forgot to remember,….. to just be me.
Not today though. Today is a new day. And I think I’ll just be me.
PS. I AM a badass superhero though.